From Here to Eternity

Today felt like the longest Sunday ever. Usually Sundays fly by. In large part because that dreaded Monday morning looms in the shadows. But today was refreshing. I accomplished everything on my list and had time to spare! What a concept!

For a good day, it actually started out a little shaky. There's nothing like waking up at 7:30am on a Sunday. Sun shining, birds chirping, and a frantic husband yelling that we're late for work! "Honey get up - we're late! Why didn't you make me set the alarm?" Once I assured him that it was Sunday and that it was too early to be up on our day off (as well as reminding him that even if it wasn't Sunday, it wasn't MY job to tell him to set his alarm), we laid back down. Only to be jolted up once again. This time by the most heinous grating sound echoing up through our bedroom windows. What the hell could that be on a Sunday morning, you ask? Oh right! My neighbor (no names shall be named, but here is a hint - we're related!) was filling the cracks in his driveway with cement and using a shovel to skim the excess. "Pat pat pat, scrape, scrape, scraaaaappppeee....." Doesn't everyone do that on a Sunday morning? Brush your teeth, read the paper, go to church, cement the driveway??? Hmmmm....

So since we were up early, Ken and I cleaned the house. All of his earlier transgressions were forgiven once I saw the bang up job he did of dusting and polishing the furniture. Once we finished cleaning and did a few loads of laundry, we checked the clock. 11 am!!! What!! Were the hands actually moving? We agreed on the obvious scientific explanation. Apparently time had stood still, so we were going to take advantage of it. There were a few household items we had been meaning to pick up, as well as some last minute needs for our upcoming vacation. We got dressed and headed out to do some shopping.

Now, I know that I rag on my husband some times when I try to be funny, but he really is one of a kind. I am the luckiest wife, because....the man loves to shop. And I am not talking about lame things, like tools or electronics. I am talking full-on clothes and home goods bargain hunting. He is the best shopping partner I have ever had. It's priceless. So like I said, we needed a random assortment of things -a suitcase for Ken, new sunglasses, a dish rack, and skewers for the grill. Usually finding this specific of a list could pose quite the time consuming process. But not on Perpetual Sunday! We found ALL of these things in one store (Marshalls is usually hit or miss, well today was definitely a HIT). It took all of 45 minutes....with 15 minutes dedicated solely to modeling sunglasses for each other, of course.

After completing all our necessary errands,we still had time to do lunch at Panera AND I got a manicure and pedicure while Ken picked out some new shirts at the mall. At this point most people would call it a day. But not on Super Sunday! Ken followed up with a 2 hour baseball practice and I took the dogs for a walk around the city. We ended the night with a sushi dinner and a movie.

When I woke up this morning, it felt like today was going to be the worst day. But clearly we traveled through the space time continuum or something, and were rewarded with an absolutely fulfilling day! I am so thankful. Especially since I just remembered that tomorrow is Monday. Crap. I hope Ken forgets to set the alarm.

Getting back on track...

Ok, so I know that I have totally abandoned this whole blog idea for the last three or so months. I feel lousy about it, but honestly I couldn't help it. I just wasn't in a creative place. Usually when I write these blogs I like them to have a comedic or sarcastic flair. You know, since I am by nature a wise-ass. But I haven't felt very witty or entertaining lately.

As most of you may now know, I suffered a miscarriage. Obviously this was not something I wanted to blog about, because, well, I thought it was tacky to divulge something so painful and personal for just anyone to read. But, alas, I was in a pickle. Against my better judgement, and that voice in my head that sounds like my mother, I had already told my "cyber friends" when I became pregnant. Funny how when it was good news it didn't seem inappropriate! (go ahead let the finger wagging begin). Right. Except on the flip side, I then had the oh-so-uncomfortable task of having to explain to the internet community at large that I was no longer pregnant. Trust me, my mistake for putting anything so personal online in the first place. Yeah, that's me. The kid who always has to learn things the hard way.

So there it is. The reason the last two and half months have sucked. The reason I have been too hung up to write a new blog. I am happy to say, I'm past it. Especially after this last hurdle.

So, back to more important topics. You know, like why you always end up one sock short after doing a load of laundry. It never fails. No matter how careful you are, one always disappears. Or, why some people don't change the toilet paper roll when there is clearly only one square left. One square, really? Who uses one square?

More on these little gems later.....

Happenstance Romance?

With Valentine's Day looming on the horizon, I am going to write about something today that some of you will think is sweet, and some of you will think is nauseating. I am going to reflect on when I first met and fell in love with my husband. Now, if you are part of that group that says "Oh gag me...you two are too much already, so sappy" or "give it time you are still newlyweds," then sadly, I must tell you to take a long walk off a short pier. I am giving you fair warning that you should stop reading now, because the story of how we first got together is the stuff that ABC family and Lifetime movies are made of. Real "chick flick" stuff!

Anyway, I will ignore those of you who are green-eyed cynics and continue on. Since around August of 2004 I have been completely and utterly in love with Kenneth Dell Isola. If you really want to go back, I have had a crush on him since we met in 1999, but 2004 was when we became true friends and the proverbial instance of being swept off my feet occurred.

I will never forget the moment when I realized that I was over-the-moon, out-of-my-mind in love with him. (That's right I remember the exact moment, deal with it!) We were not even dating yet (forward, I have always been!), but just hanging out as friends. We both worked for the same company and happened to be working at the same outdoor summer event. And when I say happened to be working the same event, what I really mean is I finagled it that way so that I could see him. Anyway, it was the end of the night, the event was over, and we were sitting on the hood of his car just talking. And not that shallow, try to impress the opposite sex kind of talking, but really talking and listening to each other. This is still one of my favorite qualities about my husband to this day. He doesn't do fake, he doesn't try to impress, he is always just 100% himself. That night we talked about our interests, families, even what we wanted out of life. Oh readers, this is when I was hooked. A man who was honest, sincere, kind, and not to mention totally easy on the eyes!!

Before I knew it, summer had become fall, and I had yet to find a way to cross what I like to call "the friendship bridge." You know that line that appears somehow when you are friends with someone first? I couldn't just leave it to chance! I had to get us together in some sort of date-like scenario/environment. Something at night, and definitely something separate from work. So I did what any sane, together, 21st century, modern woman would do. I met up with him on a Friday and invited him to a birthday party for my roommate being held the next night at my apartment. Sounds fine right? Except for the fact that this party had yet to exist! No guests had been invited. No food had been purchased. Hell, it wasn't even my roommate's birthday! But Mama always taught me to go after what I wanted, so I sprung into action.

I ran home to my roommate and enlisted her to calling everyone we knew. A hodge-podge guest list it was, but that didn't matter. He was coming to my place! In less that 24 hours! We exploded into Johnny's Foodmaster, scared half the population of the Republic of Cambridge, and grabbed whatever we could that was edible. I called my more boozey-oriented friends and make them promise they would supplement with whatever they had in their liquor cabinet. Ok, guest list, food, and drink were taken care of. Now eight hours remained for what was most important: picking out my outfit and doing my hair!

Cut to later that night. Bestill my heart! He arrived at the party, cooly and fashionably late, looking too adorable. I knew right off that it was a good sign I wasn't the only one who took extra care on my appearance! I was my graceful and charming self. Which, if you really know me, means I only tripped/dropped things/nervously laughed for half of the time. But it didn't matter. He was still super attentive and interested in hanging out with me. A guy who liked me despite myself! I knew I needed to marry him! But I calmly reminded myself to take one step at a time. Like securing a second date :)

And I knew he was hooked too, because he was the last one to leave that night. Ok, actually he didn't leave, he crashed at my place. We were drinking wine and talking so late into the night that I couldn't let him drive. But I can honestly say that I am a good girl. I made him sleep on the couch. He still teases me to this day about that, but I know that he liked me even more because I did! It was only our first date after all! But what an amazing first date it was. I went to sleep that night tingling from the excitement. I had liked him for so long and I finally broke some ground! I'm not even sure if he knows it, but I laid awake all night, knowing he was just outside my door, my mind racing and heart pounding.

That first night led to a more traditional second date, dinner and a movie. And so on and so on. Our courtship was nothing short of lovely. Each moment we spent together we fell more and more in love. Dating led to a committed relationship. A committed relationship led to living together. Living together led to adopting dogs together. And finally marriage. We have been married one year, three months, and two days. And every night when I lay in bed next to my husband I still tingle, my mind still races, and my heart still pounds. He is truly the love of my life. A good man, no a great man, whom I am so lucky to have. And to think, none of it ever would have happened if I hadn't thrown a last-minute, fake party! Take that Martha Stewart!

Happy Valentine's Day Ken. I love you always.

Head Games

Oh, I have done it again. I had promised not to lag between blogs posts, and what have I gone and done? Smashed that promise into a thousand little bits! I really have no excuse. I could try and explain how busy at work I am, or how much time the house renovations are taking. But to be honest, I really just can't bear to look at the computer lately. I am on it almost all day in work, and when I come home I just want to have dinner with my husband and then sit and read a nice book. No screens allowed.

Ok - all of that was a lie. I just thought is sounded better than the actual reason I have lapsed on my blogging: Super Mario Brothers for Wii. I kid you not. I am a grown woman, about to turn 30 (GASP!) and I can not stop playing this damned video game. It is like crack, except you keep all of your teeth.

I apologize for lying to you, but that is a sign of addiction isn't it? Seriously people, I may need an intervention. Call up A&E - get me on that show. I try to just play a game or two, but it always turns into this obsessive marathon. I find myself getting tired and bleary eyed, and yet still I push on. Jumping, sliding, fire-balling my way into a video game coma, "I just need to beat one more Castle!"

Oh, those Nintendo people. They have been screwing with me since I was six years old. That's right - you know, the original Mario Brothers and Duck Hunt. Followed by years of Super Mario Brothers, Nintendo 64, all the way right up to Mario Kart and The New Super Mario Brothers for Wii. It's a god damned dynasty I tell ya! It gets into your head somehow. And you JUST CAN'T STOP.

At first, my husband thought I was crazy. "Oh aren't you cute with your silly little video game!" His patronization was short lived, however, once he picked up that Wii remote. He was watching me fail over and over again at a certain portion of Level 5 (that damned monster fish!), when he grabbed the remote from my hand and condescendingly stated, "Let me show you, so we can turn it off already!" And that my friends, was all it took.

Later that night I awoke from a deep slumber to the sounds of jingling coins and that annoying "hop, hop!" song coming from my living room. There he was, in the pale blue glow of the TV, eyes pasted open, fingers blistered, trying to beat Level 1. Crack I tell you, crack.

So now we are both in a shame spiral of addiction. Blowing off dinners, ignoring phone calls, and sadly, abstaining from the mountain of laundry, all in the name of saving Princess Peach.

Our house is dusty, our refrigerator is empty, and our thumbs are ravaged. This witch better be worth it!

Perfection

Three days until Christmas. Wow the holiday season has flown by! And I am so thankful that it has been so much fun this year. My strategy of staying positive and having a Merry Christmas has worked thus far! I followed my advice and completed everything I listed in my last post. I am telling you people – it works!

I am also contributing to my success, the fact that I have been able to ultimately avoid those I like to call “Debbie Downers.” You know the type. Dashing through the snow, in a suped-up SUV, to the malls they go, complaining endlessly! Geesh! These people amaze me! This is the time of year to focus on all we have and to be thankful for our blessings. There are so many people in the world that are less fortunate. I don’t think having too many holiday parties or having too many gifts to buy should qualify as a plight! Do you realize how ridiculous that sounds? Yeah, it really stinks having a ton of loved ones to spend quality time with. And man do I hate being fortunate enough to be able to buy gifts for them all! Now how stupid is that when you really think about it??

But these “Debs” just keep on finding things to harp about. “The stores are crowded.” “I have soooo much baking left.” “The kids are driving me crazy.” “Ugh, more snow?!?” It is official. These statements totally piss me off. Sorry for the harsh language, but seriously, what are you complaining about? Thoughtful giving, yummy, sweet-smelling cookies, happy little children, and a blanket of snowfall – yup, sounds hellish!!! NOT!

So just to clarify. You’re upset that your kids are joyous and excited? At Christmas, no less? I know kids tend to get hyper and bouncy this time of year, but isn’t that a good thing? I mean that precious stage, when they believe in all the magic and still love the family get togethers, doesn’t last very long. We should enjoy it. No we should revel in it damn it! Parents, let us not forget that, before you know it, your little Billy or Suzy will be 16 and want absolutely nothing to do with you. So encourage your children’s emotions and soak up the memories.

And I can’t even go there about the snow anymore. A WHITE CHRISTMAS. Hmmm….I think that is what most would consider idyllic, no? There is even a famous song about it. You know, just in case you haven’t had Oldies 103 on constant rotation for the last 2 months. Christmas in New England, I couldn’t ask for more. Who wants to decorate with a Santa in Bermuda shorts and a surf board? (Sorry to all my friends and family in warm climates, but I just couldn’t do it!) Playing in the snow, drinking hot chocolate, and cuddling by the tree under three blankets – that’s Christmas!!

Oh “Darling Debbies” – you annoy me on so many levels. But your crowning achievement definitely comes in the idea that you have to achieve a “perfect Christmas.” Like if you can’t find a Zhu Zhu pet, or you didn’t’ get those designer stockings you wanted to hang, Christmas will be ruined! I think you need a little perspective on what a “perfect” Christmas really is.

Perfection is in the little things. It is the smaller, more memorable moments in life. Not in how well you decorated the house, how the ham tasted, or how many much you saved on the blue ray player. So what’s important then? What makes a Christmas perfect?

For me, it’s the look on my niece’s face when she sees snow. The feel of my nephews hugging me after I help them wrap presents they picked out for their mom. The smell of my sister’s kitchen as she cooks us all Christmas breakfast. It’s the sound of my husband belly laughing when I dance around the house to Christmas carols. And it’s the feeling I get every time I write out a gift label to my parents. Who, for my whole life, made sure I had plenty. These are the moments that make it special. If you focus on these, your Christmas will achieve true perfection.

"You know...Santa Claus, and ho ho ho, and mistletoe, and presents to pretty girls!" - Lucy

Happy Holidays readers!

I am ecstatic because it is my favorite time of the year, Christmastime. Who doesn't love Christmastime? Ok, all you Bah-Humbugers can exit stage left, because I have decided that this year I will not let anyone or anything kill my spirit. It never fails, every year I try to stay happy and positive, and every year stress and negativity penetrate my happy place. Well not this year! I have devised a plan of what I should do and what I should NOT do, in order to keep my yuletide gay, and make my 2009 Christmas special and memorable. Feel free to adopt this list for yourselves if it applies.

#1 - Avoid the malls at all costs. The mall is evil. It is the complete antithesis of the Christmas ideal. Rushing around looking for some sold out item, while dodging dirty looks and frantic shoppers. How does this help generate and pass on the spirit of the season? Buying meaningless gifts and stalking your neighbor over a parking space is not what the holiday should be about. Not my idea of Christmas cheer. Abstaining from the mall definitely makes the number one spot on my list.

#2 - Have Christmas carols on constant rotation. I don't know about all of you, but the classic versions of Christmas music always makes me nostalgic for my childhood Christmases. And when I think of Christmas as a child, it brings an automatic smile to my face. Now I know everyone has their particular taste, but Jonas Brothers singing some plastic pop version of Oh Holy Night should not qualify. It has to be Andy Williams, Burl Ives, Nat King Cole, Johnny Mathis, Judy Garland. You get the idea - the Time Life Treasury of Christmas, if you will. Don't laugh, it was a very good investment. It always boosts my holiday cheer.

#3 - Sit by the tree whilst drinking hot cocoa and watch the following holiday movies AT LEAST once before Christmas Day: A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, and Santa Claus is Coming to Town. Nothing like old-school claymation and animation to get you all warm and fuzzy. Oh that is a good point: fuzzy. Definitely wear some fuzzy socks while completing #3.

#4 - Buy gifts that have meaning. Now I know this is probably the hardest one for most people, but I mean it. Don't just settle and buy the video game or generic sweater. Really take the time to think about what the person would want and appreciate. Something that they will remember. Not something they'll just add to the pile, then stuff in a closet, and then totally forget about by February. Parents, instill the real spirit of giving in your children. Teach them to be thoughtful. Trust me, they will appreciate it when they are grown. And they will cherish the memories of how it feels to give and receive thoughtful gifts.

#5 - Decorate with things passed down through family. Forget these new expensive LED, laser, projection, space ship-type decorations that seem to be all the rage. Technology is fun, don't get me wrong, but it can be cold and impersonal. Decorate with pieces that trigger happy holiday memories. Do you know what my favorite decoration is? An old ornament that was my Nana's. As a kid I called it "Nuns in a Barrel." It's a silly little thing, a tuna can covered in felt with a little choir of Nuns glued inside. Random, I know, but it was hers. And every time I take it out, I remember her letting me put it on her tree when I was young. So I love it more than anything. My grandmother has since passed, but this one, tiny ornament brings her back so vividly. To me, it's priceless.

#6 - Donate to Toys for Tots. Or donate to a similar organization. When my nephews were little, I would take them to the toy store at Christmastime and have them each pick out a toy they liked. Then I would bring them to the local fire station and have them donate it to Toys for Tots. I plan on continuing this act with my own children one day. Teaching our children about giving to those less fortunate is the prime example of what Christmas should really be about.

#7 - Continue a childhood tradition. Even if you are an adult and do not have children. Pick something from your childhood holiday routine and do it. Maybe it's making a strand of construction paper rings of red and green that you hang, removing one ring per day as it approaches the 25th. Maybe it is visiting with Santa and having your picture taken. Or maybe it's attending midnight Mass. Mine happens to be listening to the entire album of A Chipmunk Christmas while baking cookies. Alvin always still wants a hula hoop, and I always smile because he does. Trust me, doing something that you did when you were little, even if it is silly, will always make your Christmas special.

#8 - Visit with family. I know. I have heard all the jokes about dealing with family, and in-laws, and stress and not enough time, yatta yatta, yatta. But nothing....nothing, makes it feel like Christmas more than when you spend time with your family. Throw a party for your relatives. Visit an aunt or uncle you haven't seen in a while. Invite all of your cousins over for dinner. Eat, drink, and be merry. But do it together. Make the effort. The holidays are not quite the same without your loved ones.

#9 - Bake and decorate Christmas cookies! Even if you are not the best baker, buy the easy sugar cookies and focus on the decorating. There is just something about the activity itself. The smell of the cookies baking, and the fun of trying to skillfully decorate them, is a good time for both children and adults. And as a bonus - now you have something homemade to leave for Santa!

and last, but not least...

#10 - Be sure to tell your loved ones just how much you care about them. Life can fly by sometimes. And we are all so busy working, going to school, taking care of our children, our homes, and all the rest, that we often forget to stop and tell each other how we feel. So find some mistletoe and tell your significant other that you love them. Buy a holiday card for your Mom and write to her just how much she means to you. Call your sisters and brothers and wish them a happy and healthy holiday season. Kiss your kids goodnight and tuck them in with care. The more love you give, the more you will feel in return. And isn't that what we all want for Christmas?

Get Well, but GET OUT!

OK. First off let me start by saying I suck. Yep. I started this blog to get back into writing, to devote time to something I enjoy, and what have I done? Let it slip! Doh! Sorry it has been so long since my last post. I will try not to let that happen again.

Ok, now that that is off my chest and I feel all warm, fuzzy, and guilt-free, on to today's topic. It is something I am going to call Illness Etiquette. That's right. The basic rules of what to do, or more precisely what NOT to do when one is sick. Now this refers to typical seasonal sickness, not long term disease, which I would be less sarcastic and more sympathetic to. (don't laugh, I would!) Nope. This post is for all you geniuses who think that is it ok to be hacking up phlegm and still come to work. Or those of you who still send poor little Billy or Suzy to school when they have a fever of, oh I don't know, 103!! You know who you are.

And to further shame you, I am going to refer to you people as The Pretenders. No you are not named after the cool band. You have been dubbed such because you are infamous for getting sick and then pretending you are not. Or getting sick and trying to return to the normal world prematurely. I must say I don't understand this phenomenon. When I am sick, I totally milk it, for as long as I can. Staying home, laying on the couch, and watching TV or reading all day while my husband caters to me? Doesn't sound too shabby to me. Especially if I look and feel like death!

So why Pretenders, why? I have heard all your arguments, and I must say, I am not buying any of them. Like when you say you are "not that sick," or you have "just a little cold," or my personal favorite, because you "are starting to feel better." LIES I tell you! For what? Just so you can return to work, or attend some function? Well guess what? There is no such thing as being a "little sick." You either are or you aren't! That is like saying you are only "a little pregnant!" And if you are only "starting" to feel better, then you are not really better yet are you? I don't know about anyone else, but I am willing to sacrifice seeing you until you are 100% sure. I mean is it going to kill you to wait another few days to fully recover? Choking, sneezing, and oozing out of your orifices is not considered healthy, nor is it polite. None of us are spewing our juices around like that. So why do you still insist on leaving your house? Take the hint...we chosen healthy ones...we don't want you around!!!

So I do wish those of you who have contracted the swine, or just the typical cold weather bug, a speedy recovery. But I am begging you please, please, PLEASE stay home and really get well. Especially with the holidays coming. No one wants to eat a contaminated pumpkin pie, or sit next to your sticky-fingered, runny-nosed kid at dinner! I mean you people do realize that this is how the pandemics live on, right?

Come on Pretenders. Learn Illness Etiquette! Don't punish the rest of us with your germs just because you think we'll miss your presence at the party, or that we can't get along at work without you. Because in all honesty, we hardly notice you're gone. Yes, sorry to say, but the world does keep spinning. So, please do not return to it until you're not!